Supporting a Stroke Survivor at Christmas
Christmas can be a wonderful time but it also brings heightened expectations and emotions. In this blog, we suggest ways that loved ones may be able to support a stroke survivor at Christmas.
We Might Need Help with Preparation
Many of us stroke survivors are living with post-stroke fatigue and cognitive issues which can make everyday life difficult. The added pressure of organising gifts, planning meals or any of the extra admin that comes with the festive season can be really difficult. Those of us with physical disabilities may need help with things like writing cards or wrapping presents. If you have the capacity why not ask the stroke survivor in your life if there is anything you can help them with.
Plans Might Change
Remember: just because we did it today doesn’t mean we will be able to do it tomorrow. We may not be able to commit to all of the celebrations over the festive period. Please be understanding if we have to cancel or come home early. We are likely to be just as disappointed that we can’t keep up with things like we once could. We hope you will understand that we are not being lazy but pacing ourselves and listening to our body, which is important for us to manage our conditions as best we can.
Noise & Lights Can Be Overwhelming
If you are you are hosting a stroke survivor on the big day please be mindful that noise and lights can cause sensory overload. We do not expect you to be silent or change your plans but having awareness of the impact this may have on us can mean the world to us. Can you provide a quiet, dark space for us to go to if we are feeling overwhelmed? If so, please let us know where this is before the event, it will make life so much easier if we can just slip away without it being an issue.
We May Have Dietary Requirements
Some survivors have difficulty swallowing and are therefore fed through a tube – please understand if we don’t want to sit and watch others eat this year.
Many of us are on medication, if you are unsure what we can and can’t have – please just ask. Certain medications interact adversely with alcohol, please provide some non-alcoholic options if this is the case.
Some of us struggle to cut up or swallow our food which can be embarrassing – please ask us how you can help with this beforehand or provide options for us to eat independently.
It Might Not Feel Like ‘The Most Wonderful Time of the Year’
Christmas can bring up all sorts of emotions in all of us. For stroke survivors, it can create a longing for Christmas’ past. We may start to reminisce about our life before the stroke, when we may have had different abilities. We may be struggling with pain or grief. There is no miracle cure for these emotions but checking in and listening can really help us to feel less alone.
Some people may hideaway at Christmas and self-isolate. If you notice that your loved one is doing so perhaps just a message to say you are thinking of them or a no-pressure offer of company would be well received.
It is useful to remember that every stroke and survivor is different. The suggestions above are not one size fits all. Some survivors will not need any extra help or attention and others will require much more. For most of us, just asking the question ” Is there anything I can do to help?” is enough. The fact you have taken the time to read this is a testament to how supportive you are.
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