Hi, my name is Nigel and… I am a Stroke survivor. Now that I have got that off my chest, here’s my story.  I work for a vehicle remarketing company and I am a husband, a father to three and I enjoy keeping fit.

I had my Stroke in April 2018.  I was 46 at the time.  On the Sunday I had been for my usual run, showered, eaten dinner, watched evening TV and then gone to bed.  I woke up on the Monday, had breakfast and went back upstairs to shower.  It was all going so well!

I got undressed to ready to wash….but never made it into the shower.  I went down like a sack of spuds!  As I collapsed I managed to shout and my son, William, heard me.  Another thing I mumbled was ‘ambulance’.  He went to tell his Mum who was getting the food delivery in at the time.  It was 7 am.

From the description Will had given to Nicky, she assumed I had pulled my back – as I have a history of a back injury.  Will had come upstairs again to see me and told his Mum something wasn’t right, Nicky called for an ambulance.  Nicky still feels guilty about this ‘delay’ but it was a couple of minutes, maximum.  Fortunately, there was an ambulance in town, just finishing a shift.  The ambulance was on the drive within a few minutes.  The paramedics came upstairs to me.  I remember very little about the journey to and arriving at the hospital, apart from a few flashbacks.  One of these was coming out of a CT scanner in the crash room, looking up at an image of my brain with two big marks on it and thinking, that doesn’t look very good!  The blood clot had split into two in my brain.  Another flashback was telling Nicky’s father, who had appeared from somewhere, to turn off his mobile phone as it was ringing and saying “We are in hospital.  It’s full of sick people, you know’!”

I remember nothing then until waking on the ward, opening my eyes and seeing a different looking, confused world.  I could see some bits, but not others – and the bits I could see did not make much sense.

I was discharged from the hospital within a week, exiting on crutches. From having superb care in the hospital the feeling of suddenly being home was good.  However, whilst I was glad to be at home, we were shocked by the sudden lack of support available to me. When we left the hospital, Nicky was given the name of a charity,  Different Strokes.  It was the continuous drive of Nicky, along with the support of Different Strokes, that firstly, helped Nicky get the best care for me and secondly, the charity provided the most incredible listening ear when times were tough.  Don’t get me wrong, Stroke recovery, both physical and mental, has to be driven from within, but some great help, advice, assistance, direction and the occasional bit of tough love is needed!  The challenge is hard, and that’s why I have met some of the most inspiring people.

I won’t shy away from this.  I have been lucky. I have had great support from Nicky and the ‘children’ (aged 21, 19, 15) and we have all become closer as a result.  I have had great support from friends and my employer.  I know that without this, the experience would be very tough.  Different Strokes has been a great big lump of icing on top!

Whilst I was recovering my eldest son, Reece, had an operation, which Nicky had to deal with on her own.  I am telling you this as it was Reece’s consultant who said to me that you can approach life now in one of two ways, “Why me?” or alternatively “I am still here” – and get on with it.  A bit blunt I thought, but I carry these words with me still.  Don’t get me wrong, I still have tough days but generally, I am very positive and thankful that I am still here.  I seek out the positives.

I was back working full-time after 6 months and I am increasingly taking on more and more responsibility each day.  I still have a visual field challenge that prevents me from driving.  This may improve further, or it may not.  My mobility is good and still improving.  I do enjoy a good rest still.

I have typed this whilst sat within the Different Strokes office in Milton Keynes.  Nicky and I basically came here today to say, “Thank You!” – the informational and emotional support they have given to Nicky and me, we will be forever grateful for.  What a fantastic team.

I am thankful I am still here for my family and I have met many new people.  I have completed cycle rides and runs in the past for charities, only now though do I fully appreciate the importance of what they do.

I look forward to continuing to be a Dad for our ‘children’, a partner for Nicky and fully appreciate the more simple things in life.  I know no stroke is the same and recovery varies but the advice I can pass on was given to me:  you have two choices in which to approach post-stroke life, “why me?” or “I am still here!”-  and get on with it’.  It is tough but so can you be!