Why it is Important for Stroke Survivors to Find People Who Understand

David Morten

"At the age of thirty, I never expected to have a stroke. Unfortunately, that is exactly what happened, and a slew of other struggles soon presented themselves during my recovery. As a highly creative writer, I chose to use my skills to help other people in a similar situation so that we can all feel less alone during the aftermath of having a stroke at a young age."

Something I would urge anyone to do who has had a stroke is to talk to other survivors.

You may want to do this in person via a support group, or simply find an online group on social media.

Either way, it is always great to share your experiences as you may have some advice that could help someone else, and you may hear from someone who can also help you.

However, the main reason it is great to speak with other stroke survivors is because few people know what it is like to go through something this difficult themselves or know how hard it is to watch a loved one struggle.

It sounds obvious to say it out loud, but I have found that speaking with other people in the same boat really helps put things into perspective.

For example, I talk a lot about what I have lost after suffering a stroke at a young age, and about some of the ridiculous things that I have been told by other people who do not understand what it is like to have a near invisible disability. Many people have accused me of faking being fatigued or overexaggerating the weakness in my left side so that I can get perks like a disabled parking badge or a free walking stick for extra sympathy.

In the past, I have had to combat these ridiculous accusations by explaining to these individuals that I have lost far more than I have gained. I no longer get to play music with my guitar, and certain concerts are not suitable for me in my current state. Though, these retorts are often futile, and you will never change someone’s mind once they have drawn the conclusion they want to reach.

Such interactions can cause negative thought spirals, and it becomes easy to feel isolated and alone when some people can’t or simple won’t try to understand what it is like for people who are living with the aftermath of a stroke. There have even been times when I have doubted my own competence and lack of abilities, which only leads me to push myself in dangerous ways.

That is why I will refer you all back to my original point of finding someone out there who does understand. One thing that doing this will achieve is that it helps you to realize that every stroke survivor recovers at a different rate. This will help you to feel more comfortable whenever a colleague, acquaintance, or family member decides it is appropriate to mention the other stroke survivor they have heard of is much better off than you or is much worse. There is no real way to gauge how well you are doing in your recovery until you look back and see just how far you have come.

The other main reason that it is important to speak with other stroke survivors is that it can help you to establish what can be expected in life after surviving a stroke. I used to feel awful about losing contact with certain friends in the year after my stroke, but a lot of other survivors will also tell you that a life event that big will help you learn who your real friends are. It may not be easy to hear, but it is true. This unfortunate life event will also bring you closer to some of the other people in your life, which is important to remember, and you might even find some new friends.

The last thing to keep in mind is that there are people out there who genuinely want to help. Whether it is another stroke survivor, or an official body like your local doctor’s surgery or an organization like Different Strokes.

The digital age has given everyone lots of new ways to communicate, so you may find that looking on Facebook for stroke groups to message, or joining in with some of the events on the Different Strokes web page when you are feeling helpless can really change your perspective.

There will always be times when you feel lonely or misunderstood as a stroke survivor, but it is always beneficial to look for people who know what you are going through. They are out there and easy to find.

Get support with challenging feelings after a stroke

If like David, you are living with the challenges caused by a stroke and would benefit from speaking with others who understand, why not join us at our next virtual meeting?

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